Waven's world

Episodul 1 - Nailing your wife

... înseamnă c-aţi scăpat şi anul ăsta! Felicitări şi multă atenţie şi pe viitor :)

A man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery.


He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”


The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. A sound unlike anything he’s ever heard before. The Sirens that nearly seduced Odysseus into crashing his ship comes to his mind. He doesn’t sleep that night.


He tosses and turns trying to figure out what could possibly be making such a seductive sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” Distraught, the man is forced to leave.


Years later, after never being able to forget that sound, the man goes back to the monastery and pleads for the answer again.


The monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”


The man says, “If the only way I can find out what is making that beautiful sound is to become a monk, then please, make me a monk.”


The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of grains of sand. When you find these answers, you will have become a monk.”


The man sets about his task.


After years of searching he returns as a gray-haired old man and knocks on the door of the monastery. A monk answers. He is taken before a gathering of all the monks.


“In my quest to find what makes that beautiful sound, I travelled the earth and have found what you asked for: By design, the world is in a state of perpetual change. Only God knows what you ask. All a man can know is himself, and only then if he is honest and reflective and willing to strip away self deception.”


The monks reply, “Congratulations. You have become a monk. We shall now show you the way to the mystery of the sacred sound.”


The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is beyond that door.”


The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man is given the key to the stone door and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. And so it went that he needed keys to doors of emerald, pearl and diamond.


Finally, they come to a door made of solid gold. The sound has become very clear and definite. The monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.”


The man is apprehensive to no end. His life’s wish is behind that door!


With trembling hands, he unlocks the door, turns the knob, and slowly pushes the door open. Falling to his knees, he is utterly amazed to discover the source of that haunting and seductive sound…




...But, of course, I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk.

Un joc absolut demenţial. Nu te poţi abţine să nu spargi capate de câteva ori pe zi.

Free Games

Free Games

I'm going to learn Ubuntu? lol

Nu m-am putut abţine, sunt câteva faze criminale.

Vă mai amintiţi de asta? Iată sursa de inspiraţie:

Am güsit zilele trecute un mod inedit de a întrebuinţa MC calculator. Şi anume ca browser. Asta în eventualitatea în care vă pică browserul favorit din cine ştie ce motive sau dacă vă plicitsiţi tare rău şi vreţi să experimentaţi altceva.

Ce aveţi de făcut?

1. Deschideţi aplicaţia Calculator. Ori din Start - All Programs - Accessories - Calculator ori Start - Run - calc.

2. Odată pornit aplicaţi (cu tandreţe) o scurtă apăsare pe tasta F1.

3. În colţul din stânga sus va apărea un mic semn de întrebare. Click (artistic) pe dumnealui :)

4. Select Jump to URL .

5. Scrieţi o adresa completă gen http://waven.blogspot.com and have fun!

7x13=28 Corect!
28/7=13 Corect!
13+13+13+13+13+13+13 = 28 Corect!

Nu-i aşa? Iată dovada!



Easy Math - video powered by Metacafe

Numai bine daca tot am scăpat de ziua de luni, o cursă mică şi nebunească până-n Mexic. Good luck!

1. Good: Your wife is pregnant.
Bad: It’s triplets.
Ugly: You had a vasectomy five years ago.

2. Good: Your wife’s not talking to you.
Bad: She wants a divorce.
Ugly: She’s a lawyer.

3. Good: Your son is finally maturing.
Bad: He’s involved with the Woman next door.
Ugly: So are you.

4. Good: Your son studies a lot in his room..
Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there.
Ugly: You’re in them.

5. Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids.
Bad: You can’t find your birth control pills.
Ugly: Your 13 year old daughter borrowed them.

6. Good: Your husband understands fashion.
Bad: He’s a cross-dresser.
Ugly: He looks better than you.

7. Good: You give the “birds and bees” talk to your daughter.
Bad: She keeps interrupting.
Ugly: With corrections.

8. Good: The postman’s early.
Bad: He’s wearing fatigues and carrying a shotgun.
Ugly: You gave him nothing!

9. Good: Your son is dating someone new.
Bad: It’s another man.
Ugly: He’s your best friend.

10. Good: Your daughter got a new job
Bad: As a hooker.
Ugly: Your coworkers are her best clients
Way ugly: She makes more money than you do.

de pe mail ...

Fake or real? Crazy for sure :)

Imaginaţi-vă următorul scenariu. Eşti cu familia/prietenii/mătuşa la plimbare/grătar/înmormântare. Atmosferă mai mult decât plăcută/sau nu te îndeamnă să faci câteva poze pentru a imortaliza pentru vecie momentele magice pe care le trăieşti.
Ajuns acasă, decizi să împărtăşeşti lumii întregi experienţa tocmai avută, scrii un post pe blog despre aceasta şi ca exemplificare adaugi şi câteva din pozele de mare efect, să fie!

Să complicăm lucrurile şi să zicem că după 2379 de zile de la sus numitul eveniment se întâmplă ceva şi nu mai vrei ca acele poze să fie acolo. no problem, ştergi postul sau doar pozele şi-ţi vezi liniştit de treaba.

Asta până într-o bună zi când primeşti un mail:

Poate n-aţi aflat dar începând de anul acesta Olimpiada are o probă nouă: Blow Job!
La început nu s-au calificat decât câţiva pentru această probă (probabil n-au ştiut :D) şi anume: Franţa, Irak, Anglia şi desigur ţara organizatoare China.

Dar vorbele sunt de prisos să lăsăm imaginile să vorbească:

Nu sunt 10, este de fapt doar una: fata mea nu se duce la întâlniri până la 18 ani!!! Dar totuşi să nu ziceţi că-s un tată rău, iată 10 reguli simple pe care dacă le respecţi e OK...
 Adică mai vedem!!


Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk your car horn you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay.
Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pot-bellied, balding, middle-aged, dim-witted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine...

Joculeţul săptămânii poate fi foarte stresant, dacă-l laşi să te subjuge! 

N-am trecut de nivelul 15 oricât am încercat :(

Încearcă-l! 

În perioada asta, vrând-nevrând lecturile noastre sunt influenţate şi de aşteptarea noului BB. Aşa că, absolut normal, am dat peste câteva tips-uri numai bune pentru o femeie însărcinată (universal valabile, aşa că atenţie mare!):

Dacă tot ne-nvăţa Shani despre combinaţii mortale, citez din memorie: